the blackness surrounds her, shes too scared to run
it's everywhere with her
don't let go, hang on, be strong
be proud of yourself and you'll always live on
just try what you want and remember he'll be right there with you so be strong
the thoughts of him leaving, they hurt her inside
so all she can ever do is hide
she has no fear, she's not afraid to die
the only thing she can do now is get high
It's dark, the wall is so interesting now
the pain in her eyes, makes it eerie somehow
she looks out the window, a car drives by
it isn't who she wants, and she starts to cry
she can feel the void, the hole in her heart
and he is the one, who tore it apart
he doesn't know, how bad he hurt her
she thinks that he meant it, but shes not quite for sure
her vision is blurred, theres a pain in her head
she looks in her mirror, she looks like shes dead
is it because shes not pretty, that its her he doesnt want
she hears something; its him, hes out front
a smile crosses her face, she wipes the tears away
she thinks about him, but her mind starts to stray
how can a guy, make you feel so bad
even with the body, and looks that you have
they can make you feel ugly, by looking away
they don't know they do it; but they do, everyday
The hate inside, filled with the pure infamy that I hide
tears me down, low into the ground
as it surfaces, I scream
Just die, just hide, just leave, just die
I let it out, try to let it flow
I want it to go but it won't
so I hide beneath my blanket of black
behind my back, it snears
Just die, just hide, leave me, just die
It gets late as I wait here alone
not wanting whats coming but not getting it
denying myself of the truth of what I am
and its what I need
Pull together, push away
I fall down and pray
Lay down my life, lead it astray
replace it with another, this is what I want
its what I need, to be me, who I am really, bring it to me
Pull together, push away
As I fall down and pray
Whispers in my head, possessed with what I don't have
but proud of what I do, pride takes over
through and through, as I cry
a delusion of power, journey up to the high
thats is what it fakes to be, journey into night
seeking what hasn't been sought, I feel younger
full of joy, journey into night
thinking more than the truth would be too much
talking without a tongue, its wrong
its not what it fakes to be
journey up to the high as I cry
They battle it out without throwing stones
the 2 sides of her, confuse her
what if she wants one but not the other
they come together, they fight it out
wanting to be the only one, it drives her crazy
wanting out, both of them
she screams silently, not wanting anyone to hear her pain
she then would be weak and thats wrong
she thinks, the meek shall inherite the earth
so she holds strong
What (This poem was published in a book... AND I WROTE IT)
The tears come to prove that I am always wrong
Misunderstood in every aspect of my trials
No respect leads to hate, holding my real self inside
I try to be my way but the people around me are obsessive
about reputations, stereotypes; everyone is a hypocrite
Most things I do every day turn out to be wrong
wrong is disrespect, wrong in lies, wrong in speaking my mind
I scream inside, knowing if I scream aloud
that would be wrong too.
Everyday people die, whether we know them or not
Murder, accidents, suicides
What are we going to do?
Parents kill their children, born and unborn
Children kill their parents, point-blank with a handgun
A 12-year-old girl slits her wrists, a boy kills his brother
Babies are neglected every day, there goes another... and another...
A man rapes a 6-year-old and leaves her in a ditch to die
Another man comes home to his wife and beats her til she can't cry
People are dying of horrible things and what are we doing?
I sink in deeper and deeper, the darkness swallows me
I get stuck, I scream a panic, fighting my way out
but I'm being held back
I glance around to see who is holding me and I realize
No one is here, I am alone, I am holding myself back
I am afraid to leave my black for the bigger, unknown black beyond
There everyone acts alive and happy
They don't know they are decayed corpses with rotting flesh
Here,in my black, I know what it means to leave
hoping it will get better, but out there, it only gets worse
You are scared; misunderstood.
You try to hide it but it does no good.
I see through you, your demented mind.
Everyone else thinks your intentions are too hard to find.
I know very well what you are trying to do.
Putting up a wall... so hard to get through.
Why must you be so difficult?
Why must you be so cold?
I know you are broken, dumb and jaded.
But thats no reason to be so afraid.
I'm not going to wait for your fear to subside.
Your feelings will always be bottled up inside.
Everything about him, from his hair to his toes, is beautiful.
Not one thing about him, not one thing he does, annoys me.
In my eyes, he is perfect.
To others, he is just another boy.
He knows what I'm thinking when I don't even say it.
When he smiles, it lights up everything around him.
There is only one thing that I hate about him...
and it is the way he makes me love him.
The way he dances would embarrass other girls...
but it makes me love him even more, if thats possible.
I was only with him very shortly but I felt love.
I felt love to an extent that I had never felt before.
My heart broke into a million pieces when I left,
but oh, what I would do, everything I would do,
to just be with him one more time.